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Kathy Mandell Travel Dog Lady's avatar

I used to take Cooper on rides in the car. Just the two of us. He was living life on three legs and he couldn't do long walks like the other two dogs. We used to sneak away and go for a long, long ride. I still have the car, but not the dog. I miss him. I miss those drives. I try doing it with the other two but it's not the same. He was just there. So quiet. Right behind me loving our time together.

Louise Haynes's avatar

Thank you for this article, Mindy. Losing a beloved pet tears out a part of your soul. It’s not just something you can “move on” from. Yes, there are those who “get it” and there are those who don’t. I never thought about having to reconstruct that part of your identity, but you’re right. Thank you for the ideas of the rituals. There is no time limit on grief. Each of us deals with it in our own way, and that is fine, no matter how long it takes. 🌈🐾💕

Mindy McHorse's avatar

Thank you for these lovely words! I think the most healing part of my own journey has been the part you mentioned — that there’s no time limit on grief. I really thought I should have been “over it” pretty quickly… and I was really very wrong. 💗

Louise Haynes's avatar

There are easier days ahead, but then something catches your attention and draws you back into the grief. That’s normal. You don’t have to get over it now or even tomorrow. Just be where you are with it. 🌈 ❤️‍🩹

Mindy McHorse's avatar

Exactly — such kind and true words! For me it’s often shapes in the clouds that can stop me cold. But it’s slowly becoming more of a sweet memory than a startling pain.

Angela Ellison 🐾's avatar

This is the disorienting part of grief and it really hurts. I felt such incredible pain after Chewy passed. I was his mama. My job was to take care of him and I couldn't do that anymore. Some people call it the "scream of grief." I felt that in the depths of my body for quite a long time. I am in a more healed place now that time has passed, but yet I'll always have that ache with me. We miss doing all the things we did with them, even if it was hard.

Mindy McHorse's avatar

Wow — that’s such a visceral description: “scream of grief.” And so very accurate. I feel all the same things, and relate so much.